This is obviously a pretty big topic for most.
I will tell you a story about mine.
I used to be so afraid of public speaking after doing it 10-20+ times it became much easier.
I used to think that I was never going to be creative enough to write. Now I try to write content on a daily basis.
I used to think that I will never be strong because “my body type just isn’t that way.”
Now I go to Crossfit every day and just hit my one year anniversary with Crossfit! Shout to Solace on 32nd and Park! (I love you too Crossfit Beast River and Crossfit NYC) I love the support I get there.
I had a manager that told me I should not be in sales. Now, I surround myself with the greatest and have my own sales podcast and just finished my 8th episode. I have ttakenthe initiative to build my own sales ecosystem by reaching to the folks on the sales podcast I learn to regularly and started a monthly sales meetup group). In addition to create a community on Linkedin full of sales professional that is close to 600 members where we exchange ideas and talk about best practices in sales).
I used to think I lack emotional intelligence, now I go to networking events almost on a daily basis. I have learned the skill of connecting, trust, and just being yourself. I do think most people overthink networking events. The less of an agenda you have, you just need to focus on being yourself and being able to add value, the rest will happen organically.
The point is just because you are a certain way does not mean you do not have the ability to change it. You can be whoever you want to be anyone that tells you otherwise has their own insecurities.
I truly did not believe this until recently. Anyone that knows me, people usually say I am the most extroverted person they have ever met in the world. It’s funny because I love being alone and being able just to read an awesome book, thought provoking book. I have finally learned to love myself. It was not an easy journey quite the opposite. I will write a whole blog post on that tomorrow
My relationship to failure is still getting better everyday. Doing small things like this where I put myself out there has helped me realize that anything is possible. I will never imagine that I would get over 3000 page views after blogging for short amount of time.
Fear is always going to be there. As the great Tim Ferriss says fear is never going to go away. Even stunt men have fear, its just knowing how to deal with it or acting/doing in spite of fear.
You think I am not afraid of putting myself out there so the world can learn about my insecurities, flaws, and mistakes? No, it’s incredibly scary and I do care about what other people think. I have even cried before because of people’s comments. It doesn’t mean, I shouldn’t put myself out there but there are people in the world with insecurities who like to project how they feel. Because of a number of reasons. It doesn’t mean anything about you.
So I ask you all. What is your relationship to fear? Have you thought about it? What’s your relationship to failure? How do you react to failure? Is failure bad to you? We live in a world and our parents/ families try to protect you from failure.
It is within failure where we learn the most about ourselves. Putting yourself into constant failure everyday helps mold you and learning from your failures is what separates the high performers from everyone else.