What’s your relationship to fear and failure?

This is obviously a pretty big topic for most.

I will tell you a story about mine.

I used to be so afraid of public speaking after doing it 10-20+ times it became much easier.

I used to think that I was never going to be creative enough to write. Now I try to write content on a daily basis.

I used to think that I will never be strong because “my body type just isn’t that way.”

Now I go to Crossfit every day and just hit my one year anniversary with Crossfit! Shout to Solace on 32nd and Park! (I love you too Crossfit Beast River and Crossfit NYC)  I love the support I get there.

I had a manager that told me I should not be in sales. Now, I surround myself with the greatest and have my own sales podcast and just finished my 8th episode. I have ttakenthe initiative to build my own sales ecosystem by reaching to the folks on the sales podcast I learn to regularly and started a monthly sales meetup group). In addition to create a community on Linkedin full of sales professional that is close to 600 members where we exchange ideas and talk about best practices in sales).

I used to think I lack emotional intelligence, now I go to networking events almost on a daily basis. I have learned the skill of connecting, trust, and just being yourself. I do think most people overthink networking events. The less of an agenda you have, you just need to focus on being yourself and being able to add value, the rest will happen organically.

The point is just because you are a certain way does not mean you do not have the ability to change it. You can be whoever you want to be anyone that tells you otherwise has their own insecurities.

I truly did not believe this until recently. Anyone that knows me, people usually say I am the most extroverted person they have ever met in the world. It’s funny because I love being alone and being able just to read an awesome book, thought provoking book. I have finally learned to love myself. It was not an easy journey quite the opposite. I will write a whole blog post on that tomorrow

My relationship to failure is still getting better everyday. Doing small things like this where I put myself out there has helped me realize that anything is possible. I will never imagine that I would get over 3000 page views after blogging for short amount of time.

Fear is always going to be there. As the great Tim Ferriss says fear is never going to go away.  Even stunt men have fear, its just knowing how to deal with it or acting/doing in spite of fear.

You think I am not afraid of putting myself out there so the world can learn about my insecurities, flaws, and mistakes? No, it’s incredibly scary and I do care about what other people think. I have even cried before because of people’s comments. It doesn’t mean, I shouldn’t put myself out there but there are people in the world with insecurities who like to project how they feel. Because of a number of reasons. It doesn’t mean anything about you.

So I ask you all. What is your relationship to fear? Have you thought about it? What’s your relationship to failure? How do you react to failure? Is failure bad to you? We live in a world and our parents/ families try to protect you from failure.

It is within failure where we learn the most about ourselves. Putting yourself into constant failure everyday helps mold you and learning from your failures is what separates the high performers from everyone else.

 

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What I have learned from my 18 years of being in sales so far

What I have learned from my 18 years of being in sales so far

I started my sales career working at flea market selling whatever the trend was pokemon cards, furniture.whatever the trends were. I paid for my high school student spending money by selling Cutco Knives to being in college waiting tables and selling door to door Verizon Fios.

I am now doing a much more complex sales with Fortune 500 organizations. I have done about 7 years of technology sales now.

Here are some of the things I have learned along the way.

  1. Figure out your voice and sell something you are passionate about. People always chase the money which is fine but you should really enjoy what you do because you are going to spend most of your day and life is going to be spent doing it. I talk to a ton of people that try to follow the money and it isn’t sustainable most of the time if it’s a product you do not care about.
  2. Be nice to everyone. There is no reason to be mean. There is really nothing positive that can come from it. Karma is real. Altruism is real. Check out Adam Grant’s Give and take if you want to learn more about how the top sales performers are all givers.
  3. Learn from everyone and anyone. You will meet so many amazing people along the way with such interesting stories. Even people that I would never expect I would learn from. Actually helps me learn more about myself and my misperceptions on life and how I generalize people.
  4. Read a ton. I read sales podcast articles,forums, blogs. Listen to a ton of sales podcasts. The learning never stops, The moment you think you are expert you should be careful. There is always something you can learn from someone else even in a different vertical than you.
  5. Invest in yourself. The best thing you can do with your hard earned money is to double down on your education. Whether its take a seminar you always wanted to but you weren’t sure because none of your friends want to do it with you. Always invest in either attending mastermind groups or surrounding yourself with interesting people from all kinds of other fields. It will expand your horizon and you will be able to get along with a lot more different kinds of folks.
  6. Have fun along the way. Some people take life so seriously. I was one of those people until recently. We spend so much time at work we should at least be having a good time and laughing about our mistakes or mess ups.
  7. Make friends with people in other departments. You will have so many more interesting conversations.
  8. Embrace your story. There is no good or bad. There is your own unique story. Embrace it with open arms. I was embarrassed about a lot of things in my life. How I grew up some of the awkward haircuts and funny pictures of me doing silly things. I wouldn’t say I complete embrace it now but I accept much more than I did even just a couple of months ago.
  9. Eat healthy and treat your mental health well whether it’s a mediation practice or seeing a therapist/ life coach. Any job that requires a ton of mental power and people skills you really have to make sure you are healthy. You can be the best sales person in the world but if you cannot even make it into work. That’s really going to impact your month to month performance.
  10. Take breaks every once in awhile. It is important to recharge so that you do not burn out. I feel so relaxed now after taking some time to do a ton of mediation, walk the highline, go sightseeing, walk the Brooklyn Bridge, central park, read a book at the park, and just taking a break from everything. It is important. We are all human after all.

I hope this was a helpful reminder for you all. Have fun and let’s connect if you guys ever want to chat about anything in particular.

What I have learned from coaching in general and Accomplishment coaching so far

I have learned so much about myself that it is literally impossible to write everything on paper but here are some of my take aways so far.

  1. We are all the same. Yes, some of us have different skin, eyes might be slightly different, grew up with different families or have a “funny” accent. I realized that we are all literally the same. I used to think the world was so different and that it is crazy how humans grow up and have such different lifestyles. But the more I meet people. (I currently have 10,000+) Linkedin connections so it’s fair to see I have met a ton of people in my life. The more I can see that  we are exactly the same! We all have insecurities, the cyclical nature of being motivated or committed to something. We all have relationship problems no matter how successful or how you portray yourself. Every single one of us are the same. We all need love and the want or need to be understood.
  2. There is no such thing as perfection. We are tend to seek perfection or something like that. Whether it’s trying to make more money, or make someone laugh. The want or need to feel understood is perfectly normal. I mean we all have some story or something we want to share with the world. It’s interesting to see how people open up when you are vulnerable people tend to trust you more. When you show a certain sense of perfection people tend to think you are hiding something.
  3. You can be whoever and whatever you want to be. The essence of being is an interesting concept. I have the ability to choose whoever I want to be. If I want to be son, support, curiosity, love, connection and trust I can be. There are so many possibilities and I can be whoever I want to be. There is so much power in this alone. Most people think they do not have a choice or their past determines their future quite too often. Knowing that you can have a future based conversation with yourself or with a coach can lead you to explore possibilities and actually create something around to be whatever you want to be.
  4. People are so amazing! I have so many amazing fellow coaches who have had a significant incidence or something happened that made them get into the world of coaching. For me, I would say it’s the need and want to be accepted by all. I realized that most of my life I have spent it trying to get approval of others. Whether it’s a like on Instagram or in real life where people always say wow Davidson how do you have the time to do all of that? Knowing is half of the battle, now I realized that I can live life and have the option to choose to do things because I really want to instead of seeking external feedback.
  5. If you are going to be a coach you have to work on yourself first. All of these topics are things I work on a daily basis. I am far from perfect and will never perfect. But I do see a ton of value on working on things I want to get better at whether its organizational skills, saying No instead of being a people pleaser. These are some of the projects I work on with my coach so that I ensure that I get it done instead of hoping something will happen. We all have our automatics and what we are comfortable with. The world of unknown is where true wonders and possibilities exist.

If you are interested in having a conversation with me or any of the hundreds amazing coaches at Accomplishment Coaching feel free to check out my website.

https://www.accomplishmentcoaching.com/author/davidsonh87/

I know I have only scratched the surface but there will be plenty of other coaching related topics to come.

Cheers everyone! I hope you all enjoy your amazing Holiday weekend!