How working for one of the world’s most competitive companies help me see that until I do the inner work no amount of outside success will matter
That’s the tricky thing about high achievers being on Linkedin it certainly attracts people that want better lives. Nothing wrong with that like with anything its why am I chasing Success. Am I relating to it as something is wrong with me or am I genuinely trying to serve and make the world a better place? The reason is less important and its just going through the mental exercise yourself to figure it out.
You get so much fulfillment in accomplishing your goals and dreams. Traveling to a new country that you have been meaning to, Finishing a book that’s been on your mind for awhile, publishing books, releasing a podcast episode that you feel proud of.
There was a version of me who was always working, always improving, always chasing the next goal. I’m not going to lie. That’s always still going to be apart of my DNA.
Every year for about a month- I would reflect and try to figure out why I felt off and restless. The things that used to give me a ton of joy for instance there are weeks where I pinch myself thinking wow I can’t believe I’m getting paid to go transformation retreats and be at big part of so many lives transformed so many of our clients cracking that million dollar earnings.
When I find myself saying to myself “I should be grateful.” A lot… that’s when I realize okay I need to reflect and be clear on my why so I can figure out how to make this sustainable and don’t do what I’ve done in the past which is self sabotage and leave for a shinier object.
Some of the wake up calls I’ve had was when my wife was waiting for me to eat dinner together and I was projecting my anger onto her even though I was the one who was late because I was going to networking events in NYC until 10pm most nights some years.
Thankfully god shows up that all of our sins have been forgiven. I no longer hold onto the past and I have been reborn the moment I accepted god into my life.
Never did I think that On Tuesdays I would be praying for an hour.
Thursday I would be studying the Bible with a group of men.
- Slowing down has helped me enjoy the little moments. The laughter, the deep conversations with essentially random strangers that my role blesses me with.
- Faith- I used to think Christianity was weird and why are those people so obsessed with something that never made any sense to me.
- Therapy- has been a safe space to help me feel normal and just to be able to process some of the difficulties that the human condition presents us.
- Presence- being present with myself and enjoying the process instead of wishing things would be different.
- Boundaries- to be able to say No and its okay. Not having feel obligated because of I’m Asian and that’s what we are suppose to be doing.
Don’t get me wrong- I still work hard.
That’s always going to be a part of my DNA But now I come at from a place of completeness, joy, living in the moment instead of thinking too much about the future.
I’m no longer a matryr. I take on things because I want to not because I Have to.
If you’re exhausted, it doesn’t mean you’re broken. It might mean you’re ready for a different way of living