This extended weekend was a healing moment for me. For so much of my life, I did not prioritize family and there was some guilt that I always put friends over family. It’s helped generate this pretty fantastic life where I have some of the most remarkable and incredible friends ever.
It was my first time seeing my extended family in a while. All of my cousins are growing up so quickly. My dad is in town, and he is staying at our place. I used to be pretty triggered when old school Asian parents brag about their kids oh yeah, the house costs this much oh he makes this much money, etc. Now I know it’s coming from a place of love. It doesn’t mean it’s any less cringy for me… haha.
Anyways, I’ve been driving with my dad and sister to go to Maryland to celebrate my Aunt Julie and Uncle Tango’s high achieving kids. I’m proud that they are both so successful. I had some guilt and shame around not being the best role models for them when I was younger and when I went to college. I’m happy that I can forgive and create a new future. We met their basketball coach, and he is a pretty cool guy. Seeing him light up to see many of his student-athletes be so successful reminded me of the beautiful coaching programs we’ve been apart of, and I was present to the impact that we have in the world. It’s almost unreal to sit with how much impact I’ve had in my life with others. To be able to own that is a new experience.
We spend a lot of time with family, and I’m happy that family is no longer triggering for me. I can forget the past and move closer towards the future I want for myself. It’s cool to see the completed circle so far in my life where my father and mother raised up, and then I get to be able to be of service and let him stay at our place. He’s happy that we have a beautiful home and shared this fact with my auntie through the phone.
I can also be with my father’s beautiful heart. Many could argue that he was not the most fiscally responsible human being, but we share in common that we are always giving to everyone else around us. I got my father’s heart as I listened to how he always helps out all of his friends. Many times even at his own detriment. The airplane mask analogy applies here, but I can also relate that sometimes you need to help yourself before you can indeed be able to help out others. This is a beautiful lesson and conceptually easier to understand in real practice.
Anyways, I wanted to share with you my top ten takeaways from this beautiful weekend.
- Parenting is one of the hardest things and experiences in life, and there is no right way to do it, although my aunt Julie and uncle Tango have done a pretty dang awesome job! It’s excellent modeled behavior as they’ve raised such All American student athletes.
- The power of the community to see such a strong support system. Life is all about friendships and love, and they’ve cultivated such a community of life, and that’s quite beautiful to be with.
- They are focusing on well-being and making healthy decisions leading to a long prosperous life. They have made decisions that will lead to a healthy lifestyle.
- Balance in life- of course, our lives will have ups and downs but can celebrate the little moments in life and be present. I see the addiction to video games, and I was always one of those too in middle school and in high school. I’m happy that I get to enjoy video games, and I can be in conversations to be curious about life.
- Happy that I got to ask dad so many questions. I was present to how much he loved me, and even though I was too young to remember any of that love, I know its had a massive impact into generating my beautiful heart.
- Presence doesn’t have to be talking all of the time. Jenny, my sister, has a way where she’s always listening and that’s quite precious as well.
- My grandmother, although she has dementia. I can tell that she was happy to be with all of us, seeing the whole family again with 20 of us. It was so great to get together, and when you don’t have something, you get to appreciate it all so much more when you have access to it again. I’ve never taken for granted the energy of the office and gatherings in general. Being an extraverted person, I’ve struggled so much this past year and a couple of months. It’s made me more appreciative of everything in general.
- Even going to a sit-down restaurant- I appreciate the community and space that going to a simple restaurant gives. Not being able to go to restaurants during the pandemic was tough. Something we take for granted, but I was present to how much fun it is to laugh and experience new foods. The cool thing about a restaurant is that you can try so many different types of foods every experience is lightly nuanced.
- The power of storytelling and a good laughter. Life is beautiful in a way that touches the soul. We laughed so much yesterday for her graduation celebration and it was cool to be present, not think about work or anything like that, just in the moment.
- Love- that’s the reoccurring theme with happiness. It always comes from a place of love. Always choose love over fear. It’s served me well, and I know it will serve you well as well.
Davidson Hang is currently in Sales at Cheetah Digital which is a Marketing technology company located in NYC.
Davidson is an avid networker, personal growth- life and business coach.
He loves spreading the love and regularly helps people create and design the life they want for themselves.