Ten lessons my father taught me

Father’s Day is always a weird day for me. 

How can I celebrate a man who was gone for more than half of my life? 

These are the 10 things I am grateful for my father

1. Him leaving us when I was in a Sophomore in high school was probably the best thing that’s ever happened to us. There wasn’t a lot of stability, and I remember when I moved from California over here to the east coast, I was devastated because I missed my cousin, best friends, and a lot of my old classmates. This constant need to fit in as helped me become a chameleon so that I can adapt to many different communities: the mindfulness, Asian Americans, Sales, and multiple networking groups. Our instability helped me adapt and helped me master the skill of making friends. 
2. He showed us love by taking us out to eat all of the time. That was the only way he knew how. Although it was probably not the most fiscally responsible thing to do because we had so much debt. He helped me enjoy restaurants and showed us how to take care of the people we love whether it was by taking them out or spoiling them with buying them a lot of gifts. He taught me that even if you don’t have money, you want to take care of your family. Put them first. 
3. As a child, whether it was monopoly, pong pong or Basketball, he would never let his seven-year-old son win. It’s helped me be extremely competitive especially when its comes to board games but I would be lying if I said I am not competitive about life in general. He taught me that you should always give it your all and give 110% in life.
4. Not having a strong mentor in my life or what I perceived as a strong mentor I now have started my own podcast/Youtube channel/ and blog because I want to be able to mentor others who may not have access to as many resources as I do currently working at Linkedin along with me being able to tap into so many networks. He helped me be able to mentor and help others who are under-resourced like immigrants in programs like Streetwise Partners and IMentor. He taught me how much I love giving back to others. We know how hard it is to be an immigrant in America, and I would like to support others who come to America with fewer resources. 
5. My dad was in sales, and I always enjoyed coming to the flea markets with him. He taught me that interacting with people was a lot of fun. 
6. My forgiveness process when my dad came to visit was eye-opening. I’m so glad he was able to come into Linkedin and for him to be able to see how lucky I am to work at a company that feeds me. To him, a company that pays for breakfast and lunch every day is mind-blowing. My dad taught me no matter what happens, as long as I have food in my stomach, I am fortunate to be alive. 
7. My dad took care of many aunts and uncles and helped them during their younger years. He did the best he could with the resources he has. He is always smiling even though he has had a very tough life going through a divorce, moving to another country while taking care of 8 of his siblings, and stepping up to be a support and caretaker. I was told stories about how he had even had his truck full of merchandise stolen and all of his business was in that truck. I’m fortunate that I did not have as much adversity as he did. He taught me that despite the struggles, you have the ability to start over and start fresh.
8. He brought us a ton of toys and took so many photos of us. As a defense mechanism, I had chosen to forget many of the fantastic things he did for us before leaving when I was 15. Hearing stories from my aunts and uncles, he spoiled us with toys and presents. He taught me that you could never love your children too much. I am sure it’s not an accident that I am so loving, and its probably because both of my parents spoiled me. He taught me that it always comes down to Love. Love trumps everything.
9. Over the last 16 years, my father has called my cell phone probably nine times. During the previous three months because of COVID, he’s called me four times. Although I always complain about the media and garbage that it’s programming into our minds, I’m grateful that the media has helped us stay more connected because it showed me that he cares and when he saw that NYC is basically burning down because of riots and COVID he reached out to make sure I am okay. He taught me that the power of media could be useful in certain instances. 
10. One thing I appreciate about my said is that he 100% real and authentic. He says what he wants and is firm in his beliefs. Even at the instance of losing relationships, you can’t fault a man for living his life and not caring about what others think. I respect, I can never do what he did, but there is a lesson in everything. I learned from him that we should care a little bit less about what others think and learn to live our own life. 

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