I attended a weekend-long course at the Landmark Center in Manhattan.
These were the takeaways I have personally gotten from this fantastic course that has transformed my life for the better to help me get my dream job, build relationships, and have more awareness into my automatic ways of listening.
- Be a clearing for people. I found myself listening to people from the past. Just because a person is a certain way, doesn’t mean he or she is going to be like that forever. If people related to me as my past always, I would have never been able to secure a job as an Account Executive at Linkedin. Thank you to the folks who believed in me enough to allow me to get real sales experience.
2. Listening from a context– I did not realize how I many assumptions I have about the world. One of the unanswerable questions that I often question is do people like me? Which is ironic, because everyone loves me so its good to know how much that runs my life in many of the things that I do.
3. Making peace with my past. We all have some sort of shame. It’s interesting to see how much we beat ourselves up over things that have happened such a long time ago. In 3rd grade in California, I went to a private school from the public school system, and my math and reading skills were not up to par, so I had to repeat 2nd grade.
That embarrassment and shame stuck with me so much that I had to prove myself by reading 1000+ books in self-development, business, biographies of billionaires, etc. I did not realize how much it’s still controlling my life. It’s gotten me significant career success, but it’s good to know that I can let that go and not let it consume my life anymore.
4. How lucky I am to have my girlfriend and how she always believes in me. She always says how awesome I am and was supportive of my decisions no matter how stupid they were. Our relationship has grown so much. It’s gotten us to live in the best city in the world where people are going after their dreams.
I am within walking distance of my office at the Empire State Building, and every day, I get to meet passionate people who want to connect the world.
5. Creating a space of vulnerability- Being able to share about one’s weaknesses and blind spots can be encouraging because at the end of the day. No one is perfect, and I love crying and being able to hear triumphant stories. Not talking to my dad, and because of Landmark, I have finally forgiven him, and myself has allowed me to sleep at night much better. My mind is still always creating and connecting, but at least I get a little bit more sleep than I usually do.
6. The right or wrong context- I didn’t realize how much I wanted to be right. That personal transformation has to occur right now as soon as possible, how much I value networking, and the right thing to do is to go after your dreams. Everyone is different and has different goals and priorities. Everyone is at different stages in life, just because I want to meet a billion people and meet a new person at work every day does not mean the rest of the world should do that.
Being right does not help you win friends or help people feel heard. I need to work on being open and trusting that where people are in life is perfectly fine.
7. Acknowledging people’s pain and misery- I have a tendency, and many men do this, but we all want to fix women’s problems. Someone I know is having a certain problem, and of course, I want to advise on what to do to solve that problem. People want to be heard, and if they are not asking for a resolution, I should not be making suggestions because, at times, people want a shoulder to lean on.
8. Being okay with where I am in life– oftentimes, I can be very hard on myself. Wanting to get promoted more quickly, why did I not receive the promotion? Being present and okay and accepting that sometimes things do not always work okay is helped me to be able to live in the moment and breath a little bit more.
Living in NYC, I am guilty of this myself, but we often rush from meetings to meetings, and we forget to smile at someone when walking to wherever it is. It’s such a beautiful thing being alive and being able to create whatever we want to.
9. The power of creation from nothing- Luckily, this past year, I have created so much, beautiful relationships where I can cry and be vulnerable and be accepted for who I am, a monthly happy hour where I tear up thinking about how awesome the people are that I surround myself with. A dream company where employees are treated with respect and culture is unlike anything I have ever experienced.
I get to create whatever I want, whether it’s my blog, podcast, opportunities out of thin air, and relationships with such incredible people.
10. Be kinder to myself- Being able to forgive myself, for my past, my stupid decision and my lack of thoughtfulness is a practice. Some days I feel on the top of the world, smiling making people’s days as I am told quite regularly.
Some days, I overthink about the future, am I a fraud? Do I deserve all of this beauty? But it’s important to know that I will keep making mistakes in the future. Whether it’s losing a sale or not being able to hit my goal of buying a house by a specific date, it’s all good, because at the end of the day I am alive, kicking, and I get to build relationships for a living!